I am writing a reflection of my own understanding on ‘humility’. Through these eleven plus years of serving in TWPC – English Congregation, I have learnt much of what it meant to be humble. To be humble does not imply being modest or feeling small or insignificant. It does not imply being inferior to others. It does not indicate one’s weakness. It does not apply to one who has an ‘inferiority complex’ issue, i.e. having low self-esteem. In fact, it is not easy to talk about or write about humility. I am making a humble attempt to do so here. I am unsure how it will appear to be like to you but I am relying on the Lord to guide me. I will try to relate incidences in my life to bring out the reality of humility. Life has many challenges for me. From one hurdle to another, I saw how God used circumstances to humble me. Here are some of my thoughts.

When I thought that I have succeeded, I actually have failed. I did not get what I want but God, by His grace and mercy, turned the situation around so that I may learn what it meant to be humble. I was proud at the beginning but God humbled me. God has no surprises! He knows what He is doing. He is using circumstances in my life to mould me and humble me. From one vocation, God moved me to another vocation. He had a better plan for me. Though at that very moment, I did not understand but now, when I looked back, I began to comprehend. God gives grace to the humble but He resists the proud. This has been the lesson which I am learning all these years. In fact, He is still teaching me many more lessons to come. It is not about what I want but is about the kind of person whom God wants to mould me to be. I am truly humbled!

When I thought that I have made it, I confess that I am still not yet there! I thought that I have attained a certain spiritual maturity level in term of my faith in Christ but in fact, in my opinion, I am far from it. When I was proud about my spiritual maturity, the Lord my God has to humble me to let me see the real spiritual maturity which I am in. Sometimes, I still falter in my understanding and application of the Word. The more I know the more I realise that I really do not know. Real spirituality is allowing God to show me where my spirituality is and allowing Him to change me from inside out, i.e. allowing Him to do His transforming work in my life.

When I thought that I have achieved what I want, I have to honestly say that I have been disappointed or I am disappointed with myself. I need to totally rely upon the grace and mercies of God in order to let the beauty of Christ to clearly shine through my life. When I stood aside or when I became obscured, then the Lord my God can become prominent and be pre-eminent in my life. The light of Christ shall be able to shine brightly through and in my life. I am still learning to yield myself daily to the Lordship of Christ in my life.

In Psalm 51: 17 ESV, I am learning that “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.” There are many incidences in my life where the Lord my God has to break me in order that I could really learn the precious lesson of humility from Him. I acknowledge that I could only come to God with a broken and contrite heart, for such a heart my God will not despise or reject me. Brokenness and contrition are crucial in the way God moulds me. It is really a painful process of how God is moulding me and letting me see how much I needed to depend upon Him rather than on myself. I would like to share a short write-out on humility.

Do not be proud!
Do not think that you are above others!
Do not think that you are better than others!
Do not insist on your own ways!
Do not impose your views on others!
Do not be persistent!
Be humble! Be gracious!
God gives grace to the humble.
God resists the proud.

The proud will be humble.
The humble will receive grace.
The proud will not listen!
The humble will be attentive!
The humble will listen!
The humble will be teachable.
The humble will be obedient.
Be gracious and be humble!
Be good and be honest!
Be forgiving and be fervent!
Be faithful and be fruitful!
Be focus and be friendly!
The humble will inherit the promise.
The humble will receive the inheritance.
The humble will obtain the crown.
The humble will delight the LORD.
The humble will glorify the LORD.