Love is patient
When Apostle Paul wrote to the Corinthians, he was addressing a church that was likely to be divided and riddled with pride and self-centredness. In a faith community where believers are impressed by personal charisma and inclined to favour one leader over another (1 Cor 1:10-17, 3:1-9), tolerant towards sexual immorality (1 Cor 5) and boastful about one’s spiritual gifts (1 Cor 12-13), one would expect it to be rather challenging for any believer to discern how he should relate with other believers.
Thus, it is noteworthy that in what is arguably one of the most familiar Christian teachings on love, Paul would begin by listing patience amongst other attributes as the first description of love (1 Corinthians 13:4). This tells us that love has more to do with one’s disposition and exercise of our will than merely warm, fuzzy feelings.
Here we should also understand that showing patience needs to go beyond passively waiting for a situation to improve or enduring something by holding our tongue. Love is patient means that a Christian is learning to be forbearing and choosing not to withhold love from another person despite one’s frustration or disappointment with the latter.
Being patient, this loving person is mindful that spiritual growth takes time and is willing to give others time as they learn from their mistakes and take steps to make amends. As some have observed, it is only by being patient towards another that all other aspects of love such as kindness and humility will grow through time. Indeed, love without patience is shallow and will be unsustainable, especially when a person’s pace of transformation takes longer than desired.
God is patient
More than just an ideal that Christians strive for, the loving patience that Paul described in 1 Corinthians 13 reflects the very nature of God. Throughout Scripture, God reveals himself as one who is “slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love” (Exodus 34:6-7, Nehemiah 9:17, Lamentations 3:22-24).
Whether it was providing manna daily for Israel in the wilderness or granting the nation victory over her enemies, it was God who faithfully kept his promises to his chosen people. Regardless of how often Israel broke her covenant with God by being idolatrous and acting unjustly, God chose to extend his mercies and did not destroy the nation entirely.
In the Old Testament, we see that time and time again, God sent his prophets to confront his people and urging them to repent as he has no desire for any to perish (Ezekiel 33:11, 2 Peter 3:9). With great patience and mercy, God lovingly bears with their hardened hearts and renews his promises to restore them if they return to him in humble contrition.
Evidently, God’s love is seen most clearly in the life and ministry of Jesus Christ. During his earthly ministry, Jesus showed patience towards his disciples who were often slow to understand and fearful. Despite their failings, he did not demand them to change immediately but continued to patiently teach and love them; preparing them for their mission ahead. He gently restored Peter after his denial and invited Thomas to confirm his doubts by touching his wounds.
With the crowds, it seemed that Jesus was never in a hurry. Although Jesus did get away from the crowds to spend time in prayer, he did not turn away those who were needy nor dismissed those who hungered to know more about God. Even with those who mocked at Jesus and clamoured for his death, he did not retaliate with bitterness but prayed “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34). Such was the extent of Jesus’ divine love and patience even at the point of his dying breath.
More importantly, Jesus was not just showing love – he was showing us what God is like. For in Christ, we see the fullness of God’s patient love demonstrated in flesh and blood. It is no wonder that Apostle John would declare that God is love (1 John 4:7-12).
Scripture is clear that were it not for God’s patience, we would all be lost. Romans 2:4 reminds us that “do you presume on the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience, not knowing that God’s kindness is meant to lead you to repentance”? Here we see that God delays his judgment not because he is indecisive or indifferent towards sin but because he longs for sinners to return to him.
Likewise, Paul was mindful that God extended his immense patience towards him even though he once persecuted Christians. In his testimony, he was unashamed to acknowledge that “…I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life” (1 Timothy 1:16).
I need to be patient
In a world where AI chatbots provide us answers within seconds and parcels can be sent and received on the same day, being patient can seem like an inefficient way of getting things done. Given that many of us are so accustomed to this culture of instant gratification, it is no surprise we often struggle with the pace God is moving.
But as followers of Christ, God is calling us to reflect the same love he has shown us, which is to learn to love patiently. Just because we seek to love someone does not mean he or she will change immediately. As we commit this person unto God’s hands, let us trust that the Holy Spirit is in the process of graciously working in his life.
While God never promised immediate victory, he did promise that “he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6). Undoubtedly, that would include helping us to love and giving us patience to wait for God to keep his promises. So are we willing to wait?
